Christ Alone

Story and beautiful background song sung

by Caroline Mullins

It was the summer after my eighth grade year. Mother always told me that she learned early in my life to wait to tell me things until they were ready to do them because I got so excited about them that I got hyper. If I did, I don’t remember it. Anyway, One summer day Mother asked me if I would like to take voice lessons. I didn't know what “voice lessons” were. She explained that it would be learning to sing. I loved to sing and sang all the time so I answered, “Sure, I would love to.” The next day we went to Amarillo, 70 miles away, and found a place called "The Musical Arts Conservatory".

The Musical Arts Conservatory was owned and operated by an older lady, Madame Gladys M. Glenn. Mrs. Glenn had worked diligently at finding the best teachers in all areas of fine arts. There were classes in dance, violin, voice, piano, dramatics, and more. There was a recital hall and a dance studio. The conservatory was in one of the old early American style mansions, and a beautiful place it was. One entered by the wide sidewalk up the broad steps leading to the porch that went around the building, and upon entering you found a large entry hall with all rooms off to the side, and huge stairs leading to the second floor. To the left was the recital hall. There were teaching studios in all other rooms down stairs and upstairs. Mrs. Glenn found teachers from all over the world and brought them to Amarillo. It was exciting. There were students of all ages. There were the very youngest, beginning dance students, retired schoolteachers, doctor’s wives and all in between. Students were everywhere, in rooms, on the porch and sitting in the huge hallways waiting for their turns in class. The sounds of music came from all directions. When entering one heard voice students vocalizing, piano students doing finger exercises and perfecting their pieces, violinist doing the same. One would think it would be nerve wracking to hear such a mixture of tones coming forth all at once but these were happy sounds. Every visit was like hearing an orchestra warm up. In all the years I went there I do not remember anything but warmth and friendliness from anyone. We all enjoyed what we were doing, we each had our strengths and our weaknesses, and we all encouraged each other, and enjoyed listening to each other. We learned to respect each other’s talents and abilities.

The first step was to be interviewed by the teacher. The teacher would decide if you showed talent enough to consider formal training. They did not have to take a student and they would not take one if they saw no potential. I was not worried about it. If there was any possibility of not getting to take lessons it never crossed my mind. Mother taught piano and organ. Daddy’s hearts desire was to become a band director, but that was fouled when his Father died. Daddy had been a junior in high school and his younger brother needed to remain in school. The older brothers and sisters were gone from home. The farm had to be run. It was the depression years and Grandma had to have his help. All of this had forced Daddy to quit school and take on the responsibility. I never heard him complain about it. Mother had told me of his desires. Daddy played tenor sax.

Mother had been the pianist, organist, and choir director for the Presbyterian Church. She had taught a large class of students and had been the one that played for most of the weddings and funerals, and any other special occasion in our small town. It was nothing unusual for me to be involved in a recital. I remember the first recital I took part in. My Grandmother had worked with me, teaching me to recite “The Night Before Christmas.” I gave the recitation on Mothers Christmas recital in the McLean High School Auditorium. I was 3 yrs and 4 months old. They started me out early.

My Grandmother, Yonnie, I called her, was a very good reader. She often gave book reviews, and gave readings on different programs, but the most important place I remember her reading was for our family Christmas programs. We never had a Christmas without a family program that included each one doing something as well as carols being sung by all. The Christmas Story from Luke was read by my Grandfather, Papa. The story was followed by prayer. Christ was indeed kept in our Christmas’. One of the highlights of our lives today is getting out the old reel-to-reel tape recordings of those old family programs and playing them for our current Christmases. Daddy purchased a reel-to-reel recorder when I was about 13 years old. I remember the day he bought it and surprised Mother and me with it. Daddy was good at bringing home surprises. There are antique vases, silver chests, and a very special huge glass ball ornament that still has its special place on my tree every year. Daddy was always doing something special for us. Daddy never complained about the cost nor the sacrifice it took to accomplish whatever the need or desire. Nothing was too much for his family. Taking voice lessons required weekly trips to Amarillo. That meant money for travel as well as wear and tear on a vehicle, but it didn’t matter. It was training and education! He was gladly willing to pay the bill for it all. I never heard him complain in any way. Looking back, I must admit, Daddy could have easily complained, for he traveled in his work all the time and often meeting our needs required him rushing to get home from several hundred miles away. He would clean up, load the car with formals or whatever the need was, and drive us to Amarillo. I don't think he ever missed anything we did and he never complained. He toted suitcases, paid the bills, and often (unintentionally) embarrassed me by telling someone he was talking to about what I was doing. I wish he had not done those things but I guess he had earned that right when I think on it.

I must share one funny little incident that happened when I was about 4 or 5 years old. Mother went to the beauty shop regularly. When she was going herself she would wash my hair and roll it on her finger, making long curls. It was very long, so she would take me and I would sit under the dryer while Jean, the beautician, did Mothers’ hair. It took my hair a long time to dry and I got very bored just sitting there. The dryers were the old loud ones, so you could not hear anything under them. I spent my time under the dryer singing. There were several that got their hair done in that time span. One was an older lady named Lois. My, she was a grouchy lady. She was constantly on me about anything and everything, but especially about my singing. “Why don’t you just sit there and look at a book?” she would say. On this one particular day Mother was getting us ready for a recital that evening. So when I was finished getting my hair dried and was just having to wait, while they all visited, Mother told of the recital that night. Rather then just invite people herself she said to me, “Caroline, invite Lois to come to your recital tonight to hear you sing.” I responded with, “Why, she doesn’t like hearing me sing? Why should she want to come?” Mother nearly died, but I had spoken the truth. I had spoken my heart. I knew Lois did not like hearing me sing. It was very obvious to me. I didn’t invite her either.

There is a funny second part to that story. Years later, I was giving programs regularly in nursing homes and retirement centers. I had no idea what had happened to Lois, nor did I care. I had not even thought of her. I sang at one of the retirement hotels, when I finished an older lady approached me. It was Lois. She had recognized Mother. She had been the recipient of one of my free concerts. We laughed about the incident from my childhood. She admitted that she had been very hard on me. God has funny ways of turning things around. Praise the LORD!

Well, back to the voice lessons. The teacher accepted me, and my training began when school started my freshman year of high school. I loved it! Singing was something I worked at with pleasure. It has always been my passion. I was serious about being the best I could possibly be.

My teachers were Mrs. Felice Wolmut and Mrs. Anna Louise Borneman.

Both were from Europe, both were war refugees, both had escaped from Germany with what they could carry out and their one child each, and both had lost their husband to the war. They had come to the United States as immigrants to begin life anew. I studied 2 years under each one. I also studied 2 years of dramatics with each one. So, I had private voice lessons, but I also had dramatics classes. We did many fun things in this group class and again we were people of all ages.

Taking voice was so much fun. It was so enjoyable that the 150-mile trip each Saturday was worth it even after a hard week of school.

I remember wanting to do popular songs that I really liked. My teachers would take the music, let me sing through it one time “to see how you can do this”, afterward they would say, “Caroline, that is wonderful, you will be able to sing that very well, IF you learn to sing this. Let's spend our time working on this. You can sing that at home.” And they would take me back to the classical pieces of their choice. But you know what? They were right. Learning to sing the classics made it possible for me to sing anything. I just loved singing so it did not matter what I sang, I just wanted to sing.

We sang many things. Some of which I remember and some I am sure I have long forgotten. One day during my second year with Mrs. Wolmut she handed me a tattered piece of music and said, “Let's try this.”

The paper was very old and had been torn out of a book. It was yellow with age and the edges were battered. This was in 1956-57. She began to play and I began to sight-read the song. It was in German. I thought it the most beautiful song I had every heard. I fell in love with it. It was a very intricate melody, quite different, but very melodic. It was Operatic but not what you think of as Opera. It was a love song entitled, “War’s Auch Nur Ein Traum” from the operetta “Monika”.

I was being “tested” again, but I did not realize it at the time. Mrs. Wolmut decided to allow me to sing the song and told me the following story.

It is well known that Hitler destroyed all the music and literature that existed at the time of his control. This was from one of the musicals of that era. Mrs.Walmut had been a personal friend of the Von Trappe family and was in the Vienna Opera House when it was invaded by the Nazis. She had also fled for her life just as the Von Trappe family had to flee. Mrs.Walmut and Peter, her son, had walked through the Alps carrying what she could while leading Peter by the hand. This was their way of escape. She had risked her life by keeping these two pages from the music book when the Nazis had invaded everyplace taking everything. And she had risked her life again by carrying the pages out of Austria hidden in her belongings. She loved the song so very much that she could not bear to have it forever lost, never to be heard again. She had saved it until she found the one voice that was suitable to sing it. Mrs. Walmut gave me the original music that she had carried out. She kept no copies for herself. The music was beautiful in itself but the history of it made it even more meaningful. I sang it in recitals and loved singing it every chance I had.

The years of voice lessons passed. I became a wife, and a mother, and there was no longer any place to use such a piece of music. So it was hidden in a drawer with all the rest of my music. Over years I would look at it and wish that I had Christian words for it, words that would glorify the Lord. Thinking it was truly worthy of representing Him I had no idea what the song was really about. I could just sing in German, not understand it.

Years passed and I went to work for the public school system. I met a teacher named Johanna Anderson, she taught German and had been an exchange student in Austria. I told Johanna about the music and asked if she would try to translate it. She was delighted and was happy to try. I took it to her, but it was useless. Johanna returned it to me saying, “It just does not translate well. German usually will not translate into English well. All I can tell you is it is a love song.” I thought that’s it! What a beautiful love song to Jesus it will make. So I began to long for English words that would make it a love song to Jesus. I was not a writer, and certainly not a poet. I had never written anything. I had no idea how to start. So the music was put back in the drawer.

Weeks passed, I was working at the school in the position of Audio Visual – textbook clerk. I had an office of my own in the textbook room. And if I was not busy with students then I had time to spare without pressure. I sat at my desk one day when suddenly words began to flow through my mind. I realized I had never heard nor read these words before. “Where are they coming from?” I took a sheet of paper and began to write down what was going through my mind. The words just flowed out of me on to the paper, without effort. As I read the words in front of me I realized that just maybe they would fit the music for “War's Auch Nur Ein Traum”. I could hardly wait to get home to find out.

When I arrived at home I immediately got the music and sat down to transfer the words I had been given to the melody line. Every word fit exactly into its place, with no adjustments. The song is exactly as God gave it to me.

The first verse is my testimony of my personal relationship with Him, the second is a special message for the Jewish people. God loves them so much that HE preserved this beautiful music and then sent them a special message of what HE wants to be to them.

Praise His Name.!

As I continued studying voice it only became even a greater pleasure in my life. Mrs. Walmut left the conservatory to teach in a University in the NW United States where she later became the head of the voice department. Her leaving was a major loss for us but God had a plan. After having someone like Mrs. Walmut, who would think there could be another so similar and equally good. Mrs. Glenn scouted around and found Mrs. Anna Louise Borneman to fill the vacancy left by Mrs. Walmut. Mrs. Borneman was an equal blessing in my life.

Mrs. Borneman continued with my training. The most of my training was on phrasing and expression. As a voice teacher, I have learned that if one is not given the voice by God in the first place there is just nothing to train. No amount of training will change the fact that one is just not a singer. So all the glory goes to Him. Nothing can take that away.

Iremember well the day when as a young child of about 8 we knelt at my Grandmothers house for prayer, before leaving for Amarillo to take me to the doctor with plans of being sent to the hospital to remove my badly ulcerated tonsils. I was sick most of the time due to allergies causing infection and severe asthma. After prayer, which as an 8 yr old I felt like, “lets move on,” we would leave for the doctor’s appointment. Do you know that feeling? Well, God did not pay any attention to my feelings. He just did the job He was asked by my parents and grandparents to do. When we got to the doctor my tonsils were healthy. I was not sent to the hospital and I have never had a problem with either my tonsils or asthma since that time. Praise the Lord!

Mrs. Borneman continued to work with me. We continued on in private voice and in dramatics. I continued my high school work and sang constantly for any and every occasion. My junior year in high school the conservatory entered me in the Amarillo Symphony Contest, high school division. The winner in each category was to become a student soloist with the symphony. I won 1st in voice and sang with the Amarillo Symphony. What an awesome experience! I sang “Musetta’s Waltz” from La Boheme.

My senior year in high school I was entered again but since I had won in high school division I was forced to be entered in college division. My senior high school year I placed as alternate soloist. The staff of the conservatory had listened to all the competition critically. They questioned the judge’s decision and the judge’s comments on our critic sheets. They were told by the board that ran the contest, “She is a senior in high school, the other girl is a college senior, it is her last year to be able to win. This girl can win next year.” Mrs. Glenn was very upset by this type of discrimination and the board of directors for the conservatory decided it improper. The conservatory stopped supporting the contest by withdrawing their students. This action caused the contest to be disbanded. There were no more contests that gave students this wonderful opportunity. The stand of the conservatory was that it made no difference the age. If a high school student can out perform a college student in any category then the best performer should be awarded the honor of 1st position. The judgments should be based on ability not age. They deemed the contest unethical. They had been involved in this contest for years and had never seen this happen. It was more then they could tolerate and thus took action. Sadly this was to the loss of all future musicians. It was such a joy and honor to have that experience.

My senior year I was also offered a Scholarship to go to California and be trained for the Metropolitan Opera. I turned that down. I just had no desire to sing Opera. My desire was to sing for the Lord. Mr. John Crosby, founder of Santa Fe Opera, was scouting for voices. The conservatory and West Texas State College brought him to Amarillo to hear the voices available there. I was entered in the auditions. Mr. Crosby chose me and talked to my parents about hiring me. He did not realize I was only 18 years old. He joined us for dinner to discuss the opportunity. We agreed to go to Santa Fe to attend the opera and to see the facilities. Mr. Crosby met us there and personally showed us around. But there was just nothing there that I wanted. The life style was not that of a Christian as I saw it. My desire was to serve the Lord. Again, I decided this was not for me. I turned down that invitation also. Mr. Crosby was very gracious, he told me that as long as I kept my voice up that the door was open and I could contact him at any time. I never have.

I married, had children, and raised them for the Lord, to His glory. Often times I wonder what would have been had I chosen the other road. God has been very good to me. The road I chose was the one closest to Him according to the dictates of my heart. He has poured his blessings out on me and mine, meeting all our needs and even the desires of our hearts.

I'd rather Have Jesus than the world’s applause.

I’d rather be faithful to His cause,

I'd rather Have Jesus than worldwide fame,

I’d rather be true to Jesus name.

And I say a hearty

AMEN!

I have never regretted living my life for Him. He has met all of my needs and even the desires of my heart just as He promised He would. There is no disappointment in Jesus.

~Footnote

Both the Singer (Carol Mullins)

and the builder of this web page, want

to make it explicitly clear that any advertising

on this web site that may indicate voice lessons can be

learned in only a few lessons has absolutely nothing to

do with our content...further to this any other such

misleading or questionable advertising on this web page are

totally beyond our control...PB