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When I was a child, my favorite book was Topsy Turvey’s Pigtails. I loved that book. I carried it everywhere and read it over and over again. I wore it out reading and lugging it around, the cover was partly missing, the pages were tattered, but I still loved it. Why I love it so I really do not know. It was a beautiful little story about a family of Black Stocking Dolls that lived in the Comical Doll House down by the crooked the lane. The family was very prim and trim and Mrs. Turvey was a very prim trim housekeeper, but their little girl, Topsy, was anything but prim and trim. Wherever Topsy went things seemed to have a way of becoming, Upside down, Inside out, and helter-skelter all about! Topsy had beautiful pigtails that were each tied with a bright colored ribbon. Her Mother was so tired of her Pigtails that she threatened to cut them off. But the pigtails were the pride of Topsy’s heart. To save her beautiful pigtails, Topsy decided to run away. It was a beautiful little story, quite innocent and clean, about all that happened to Topsy in her effort to save her pigtails. Years passed and I grew up, married, had kids, went through a divorce, remarried, took on kids of my husbands, put two houses together, and that required making space and finding room for two full houses of stuff in the space of one. My new husband was a bookworm, and with a college major in Journalism he was a "seasoned" bookworm. Books were everywhere! Finding room for them was a major issue. It was even more of an issue in our tiny house that already contained us plus 4 children. We struggled to find places. His Mother, Granny, loved books, so she volunteered that some could be at her house. She would enjoy them and we could also have access to them. Years later Granny passed on. His half sister moved in to live with Grandpa. She wanted the books moved immediately. We took the first Saturday and went to work through the books. Actually there was not that many and they were neatly placed in shelves, never-the-less, she wanted them moved. We began the task of trying to find space again. I remember well picking up Topsy Turvey’s Pigtails and looking at it long and hard. I placed it in the stack to keep then moved it to the stack to destroy and back again, over and over. The trash pile finally won out. I reluctantly let my favorite book go to the trash, deciding it was in such bad shape that keeping it was crazy. Over time I would think of the book many times and always with regret. I would think, "I wish I had my book back." Then again, I would remember the sad condition it was in. On one occasion my Mother asked me about the book. I told her that I had thrown it away. She was shocked that I would part with Topsy. With time I would forget about my book, and then suddenly without warning, I would wish I had it. But these were rare occasions. Years passed, life was full of many things, being a wife, a mother, a grandmother, working, another divorce, there were many joys and heartbreaks and Topsy Turvey was in the far back of my mind. One day a few years ago, I suddenly remembered my beloved children’s book again. I thought over the fond memories and dismissed it. But the thoughts kept returning to me. In fact, they became so strong that they became a passion. I could not understand why. Over and over again I would have Topsy Turvey come to the front of my mind. I began to notice antique books, and if near an antique bookstore I would ask about the book. Naturally, the first question was, "Who is the author?" and I could not say, I had no idea. Finally one day I talked to God about it. I felt stupid while I was telling Him about my feelings but I did it anyway. I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t understand why I was thinking of this book. So I told the Lord, "Father, I don’t understand why, after all these years, I am thinking about having Topsy. It makes no sense. The book is gone. I destroyed it! I do not even know the authors name, and have no way to find out. Yet this desire in me is growing into a passion. I want my book back, but I don’t know why. It is a kid's book. There cannot be anything important in it, and certainly no important reason for me to have it. But I am putting this in your hands. If you have one copy of Topsy Turvey’s Pigtails anywhere in the world please put it in my path if you want me to have it. Let me find it and make it possible for me to get it. Otherwise let me forget it, and be at peace. Amen" This casual thought was rapidly becoming a passion within me and I just did not know what else to do. So, I talked to God about it. I told Him all I was feeling about it, and left it with Him. I was at peace and nearly forgot it. It was no longer in the front of my mind and I praised the Lord for that, because I was beginning to get upset with myself for what I had done 30 years earlier and I could not change it. So I let it go and left it with GOD. I decided to trust Him with it. I immediately had peace. And I praised Him for that peace. Only a few weeks had passed when something quite incredible happened. I do a lot of online ministry. And I have some friends online that I enjoy visiting with in voice chat programs. I especially enjoy the praising rooms where we can actually speak and sing and share in live voice with each other. I had a friend with the online nickname of Lily of the Valley. I had begun to see a person online with the nickname Lily of the Valley2. I knew that Lily was having a lot of problems with her computer and had been forced to reformat it several times. Often in such situations one will lose passwords or keys that are required to sign in under existing names. I came to the conclusion that Lily had taken on a new nickname. I saw her in a room that we both frequented and tried to message her. But I received a message telling me that I was not on her Buddy List so I could not message her. I did not take it personal. I just figured that she had over looked adding me to the list and it had been a good while since we had talked because of all the problems she was having. I thought nothing of it. I did ask others in the room to message her to, "Please add me." I also put the message in text chat. Lily messaged me, but told me that she thought that she was a different person than I thought. I said, "You are Lily from Northern California, aren’t you ?" She replied, "No, I live in W Virginia." Indeed it was a different person. We laughed about it and became new friends. This is the Internet, anything can happen, and no one thinks anything of it. We began to talk to each other with text messages. I casually asked what she worked at, and she responded, "I work online." This peeked my interest. I asked, Exactly what do you do to work online? She responded, "I find books for people." I thought, "This is interesting !." But no thought of needing any book to be found crossed my mind. We continued to talk and I mentioned my Grandfather’s religious library that is stored in my attic. We laughed at the thought; She wanted to come get into my attic. Still no thought of Topsy Turvy entered my mind. I had truly, totally, let it go and left it in God’s hands. I made some comment that I guessed I had no need for her services, since I am not into "Old books." Then it dawned on me about Topsy Turvey's Pigtails. I casually mentioned it to her. Telling her that I regretted throwing away my favorite children's book that I loved. Her response was, "Who is the author?" And, as usual, I had no idea. In just a moment she said, The Author is " Bernice G. Anderson." I was shocked, and my heart rejoiced at the same time. Now I had a place to start. But she quickly added, "Just a minute, there is more." She continued, "Caroline, there is one copy available in the whole world. It is in good condition. And the price is $65. I know that sounds like a lot of money, but really, I am surprised that it is not much more. Sometimes books like this are thousands of dollars. It is a one of a kind." I could hardly believe my eyes. "There is one in the world and it is in good condition." The price was a lot, but it was attainable. Just exactly what I had asked GOD to do. God had "put it in my path." I told Lily2 to get it for me. But she replied, " No, I am going to give you the link. You can order it and it will save you the amount I would mark it up. I normally mark things up 15%, but you are so sweet, I have watched your ministry here online, and I don’t want to charge you. I want to give this to you." I was doubly blessed. I praised the Lord! I immediately ordered the book. I did not give it a chance to get away. I knew no one but God could have done this and He had reasons. Reasons that I did not understand, but I knew He would eventually let me know why. As I was filling out the form, God revealed to me the reason why. It was so clear, like God had come to me and talked to me. It was as though God spoke to me in an instant, His thoughts were transferred to my mind and heart. My answer to Him was an immediate, "Yes, Lord Yes! I will." He told me that the reason he had given the book back was Just because " I love you! " Can you believe? " Just because I love you! " Then the Lord went on to tell me. " I love all my children so much that I will give them even the desires of their hearts. If they will just trust me, just believe me, just accept me, and let me into their lives. Tell them! Take the book and show it everywhere that you go to speak about what I have done for you. Show the book and tell the people that I have not done anything for you that I will not do for them. If they will just accept me, and let me be involved in their lives. I want to be included in the details of their lives. Tell them!" " So here I am telling you. Can I say more? He loves you! He wants you to accept Him, trust Him and include Him in every detail of your life. Do you have needs or desires that have not been met? Maybe you have not included Him in the details of your life. In His Love, Caroline
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